Sunday, December 18, 2011

2011 - We Thought All You Kids Were Gonna Make It

Well I can't believe it's December and time for our end of the year wrap up! And what a year we've had, right? The amount of celebrity split ups in 2011 was staggering, coming in at 121.  We really hope next year, famous people will try a little harder to keep it together, I do have a family to run here! To my Senior Correspondents from around the globe, THANK YOU AGAIN for your tireless reporting, and to those of you who read us regularly, a BIG HUG.  You need this important news reported and we're here to break down the break ups. XOXO

Who knew Mila Kunis and Macaulay Culkin were a couple for 8 years? I sure as hell didn't but sadly, they're kaput.
Rosie O'Donnell and her real life "Mike Brady" Tracy Kachtick split up their bunch of 10(!) kids after only a year.
Rock Stars Ashlee Simpson and Pete Wentz, parents to Bronx Mowgli (seriously, that's actually his name,) sadly finalized their divorce just this month.

Several uber long marriages hit the rocks this year including Gary Collins and Mary Ann Mobley after a whopping 44 years and Arnold Schwarzenegger and Maria Shriver after 25 years (and let's not forget the discovery his love child with the housekeeper.)  Tony Danza surprised us by splitting up with his wife of 24 years, Tracey.  Hopefully she showed him who was the boss in the settlement, hardy har har!  81-year old astronaut Buzz Aldrin ended his 23 year mission with Lois Driggs Cannon.

Charlie Sheen cashed in on our blog twice this year, losing 2 of his Goddesses and most of his marbles
Winning the award for most searched name on our blog is Luc Carl, former boyfriend of Lady Ga Ga, who's break-up gave me the best subject header ITTKWGMI has ever published-- "No Longer Will He Poke Her Face."  And while I'm discussing subject headers, I can't believe I got no love for the header when Leo Di Caprio and Blake Lively's break-up inspired, "Who's Not Eating Gilbert's Grapes?"  Come on! That's funny!

Jenny Lopez is back on the Block after splitting with Mark Anthony, (but we're waiting patiently for the upcoming break up of her and her backup dancer, we're waiting. Arms crossed, foot tapping. Did she learn nothing with the Cris Judd debacle?)

To be honest, I'm not really sure if Will Smith and Jada Pinkett-Smith are split, I just know, something ain't right up in that relationship.
Kim Kardashian and Kris Humphries suck. That's all they get here for their 72 days of nuptials.

Ron Wood - Ronnie Wood
Ron Wood appeared on our blog twice in the less than 2 years we've been up and running, and we just wanted to say, we're honoured and when you're in Wicklow next, please come by for a cuppa, the kettle's always on the boil for you my friend.

The break up of the year has to be............Demi Moore and Ashton Kutcher. In our hardest of hearts, we were rooting for ya' kids. But your incessant twit-pic-ing bored us within an inch of our lives and we knew ultimately, you'd wind up in our analls.

So at the risk tempting fate, let's raise a glass and toast to the celebrities who keep it together for the long hall
-- Tom Hanks and Rita Wilson, Gwen Stefani and Gavin Rosdale, Rhea Pearlman and Danny De Vito we salute you!  We really know you kids are gonna make it.


  1. What? No shout out/salute for the Thin White Duke and his Nubian beauty?

  2. you're so right Mick!!! however i think in my heart i'm still hoping i get to marry him

  3. Ah come on nancy, I thought this blog would make it. Don't quit in account of me. Your posts sre so clever. I don't comment much 'cause I'm in awe and dumbstruck. Don't give up on us baby!

  4. No smart ass comment here, just a big smooch for keepin' it real! Can't wait to see who hits the rocks in 2012 :))

  5. have a happy holiday Nancy, and I'll send you a stack of t-mags after the new year....