Wednesday, June 29, 2011

The eX File...(I know, too obvious, right?)

                                     David Duchovny and Tea Leoni - Celebs at the US Open

Married since 1997, with a split over his sexual addiction in 2008, actors Tea Leoni and David Duchovny have split again. A divorce isn't necessarily imminent, but me thinks Tea wants someone who thinks she is the preferred beverage of choice.  I thought those kids were gonna make it.

Reports flooded in over night on this very important story, thanks to my US East Coast and West Coast Senior Sexual Addiction Recovery-Re-Break-Up Correspondents for keeping us informed.

Tuesday, June 28, 2011

Meet the F#cker...

My movie boyfriend, I mean, actor Owen Wilson has split from his girlfriend Jade Duell, the mother of his 5-month old son.  Apparently he wasn't willing to commit to a long-term relationship without having the freedom to do what he wanted with male or female friends. I have to admit, I'm siding with Jade, and I'm breaking up with him too.  I really thought those kids were gonna make it.


Monday, June 27, 2011

Losing His Religion...Goddess-less-ness...

                                   Natalie Kenly After being fired from his hit television show "Two and a Half Men", Charlie Sheen and one of his "goddesses", Natalie Kenly, stand atop a roof while attending a meeting with Live Nation. Charlie drinks from a bottle of red liquid which has been altered to read "Tiger Blood" and wields a large knife.

Again, Charlie has returned to our fair blog, we are so lucky aren't we? Natalie Kenly, the last of his Goddesses is out.  Winning?  We truly thought those kids were gonna make it.

Saturday, June 25, 2011

Heading for the Hills...

                                                  Lauren Conrad, Kyle Howard

Oh LC, although until now, I didn't know you were in a relationship, but it brings me to tears to report this sad news.  Reality TV-star, author (ahem) and clothing designer (ahem, ahem,) Lauren Conrad has split from boyfriend of 3 years, actor Kyle Howard. We really thought those kids were gonna make it.

Russion model Natalia Vodianova and English aristocrat, heir to a billion pound fortune, Justin Portman, have split after 9 years (and 3 children.) We REALLY didn't know who either of them were, but seemingly thought those kids were gonna make it.

Friday, June 24, 2011

Baby, Not Loving Her Way...

Apparently third time is NOT the charm for Peter Frampton either. He and wife of 15 years, Christina Elfers are splitting up,  citing irreconcilable differences. He's asking for shared lawyers fees and joint custody of their daughter, Frampton is not feeling so alive, eh?  I hope the other folks who share a birthday with me are OK today. Jack Nicholson? Jim Boggia? Liz V? No splitting up for you!!I thought those kids were gonna make it.

Thanks to my super vigilant Senior Rock-Legend Correspondent in NJ for the overnight news tip.

I met Peter Frampton in Nashville once:

Me: Were you really born on April 22nd?
Peter: Yes
Me: Me too!
Peter: Would you like an autograph?

Kind of a let down

Wednesday, June 22, 2011

Thank You for Breaking Up George....


Director Jason Reitman (Juno, Up in the Air,) son of director Ivan Reitman, has filed for divorce from his wife of 12 years, Michele Lee. This would have been bigger news if George Clooney didn't steal his break-up thunder today, lucky Jason. I thought those kids were gonna make it.

Thanks to my ever hard working Senior Son-of-Famous-Directors Correspondent in NJ for this very important and early news tip.

Fantastic Mr Foxy....

I know this one will be difficult for all of you to believe, but forever bachelor George Clooney and his hot Italian girlfriend of 2 years Elisabetta Canalis have called it quits.  No real info to report other than they said it is "difficult and personal" (as all break-ups are) and they want their privacy, and sure as hell don't want to be on this here blog! But it is the news, and we must report.  I really thought those kids were gonna make it.

Thanks for the news tips from around the globe on this one from my Senior Beautiful People Correspondent in Shankhill, Co Dublin and Beijing and a REAL Newswoman in Philadelphia.

Friday, June 17, 2011

Paris Waits for No Man...

Ok, even celebrity break-up blogs are allowed to make mistakes when they're tired and they quite possibly have broken their toes.  Paris and Doug broke up 100 years ago (right? I thought so too!)  Her most recent break-up is with club owner, Cy Waits. They have appealed for privacy, cause you know, in between all her reality tv shows and celebrity appearances she's actually shy and reserved and needs her space.

Shocking news! Paris Hilton and Doug Reinhardt (you may remember him from The Hills) have broken up after 6 whole months! Surprisingly, this is the first time she's appeared on this blog, so mazel tov, we'll see you again soon lady friend, hot.  We really thought those kids were gonna make it.

Hugh's Ex Gives the Ax...

To continue with our theme of Old-Guy week, Playboy Playmate, Karissa Shannon (Hugh Hefner's Ex,) has split with actor Sam Jones (Smallville and sex tape with Karissa.)  Apparently she lied to him and said she had to move back to the Playboy mansion for "business purposes" and then went back to live with her twin sister breaking his heart.  We really thought those kids were gonna make it.

Thanks to my Senior Ex-Playmate Correspondent working overtime in NJ for the early tip!

Thursday, June 16, 2011


It's old man break-up week here at the blog.  81-year old former astronaut Buzz Aldrin, is splitting with his wife of 23 years, Lois Driggs Cannon. Their petition cites 'irreconcilable differences.'   I hope he and Hef will get together to commiserate, everybody needs a really old shoulder to cry on, right? I thought those kids were gonna make it.

Thanks to my vigilant Senior Octogenarian Break-Up Correspondent in NJ for the tip!

Tuesday, June 14, 2011

Third time Not Hefner's Charm...

I SO didn't see this coming! Child Protective Services has finally caught up with Hugh Hefner and five days before the wedding, model, Crystal Harris, has called it off. Methuselah announced it himself by tweeting: "The wedding is off, Crystal has had a change of heart."  I really thought those kids were gonna make it.

AND in even BIGGER news...

The curse of reality TV couples potentially strikes again.  After 28 years, Kiss frontman Gene Simmons and longtime partner Shannon Tweed could be on the rocks! Tweed told Today Show hosts Hoda Kotb and Kathie Lee Gifford (who's hosting the Today show now? How long have I been in Ireland?) Anyway, she said that their relationship has "pretty much unraveled." And, "Those last two [years together] were a bitch,"  I will wait until an official announcement to believe this crazyness.

Thanks to my extremely hard working Senior Ridiculous Relationship Correspondent in PA for the early newstips!

Monday, June 13, 2011

No Longer Stuck in the Middleton With You...

Maid of honour Pippa Middleton has split from her longtime, cricket-player-turned business guy boyfriend, Alex Loudon.  Is Prince Harry single? I smell another Royal Wedding people!!  But I thought those kids were gonna make it.

Friday, June 10, 2011


Former White Stripes frontman Jack White and model Karen Elson have ended their 6 year marriage.  I love these two! They're even throwing a divorce party!   “An evening together in Nashville to re-affirm our friendship and celebrate the past and future with close friends and family,” White and Elson said in a statement.   I thought those kids were gonna make it.

Wednesday, June 8, 2011

Not Hers Anymore...

Engaged since December, singer-songwriters Jason Mraz and Tristan "She Sho' Is" Pretty-man have split. As Mraz told The Daily Beast, "My greatest mistake right now is, I’ve been clinging to my art,” he said. “In that, I have victory for my art and a great loss for my heart. At the moment, my beautiful fiancée is no longer my beautiful fiancée.”  Awwww, he's breaking my heart!  I really thought those kids were gonna make it.

Friday, June 3, 2011

Strike 2 for the Pretty Lady...

Waaaaaaaay back in November, I reported their break-up after only 7 months. Well apparently in the interim they'd gotten back together, but I don't report that shit. What I will do however, is report today that....Cameron Diaz and A-Rod (baseball stud Alex Rodriguez) are back in splitsville. Even after all of the Superbowl popcorn feeding. I really thought those kids were gonna make it, AGAIN! Thanks for keeping our blog a thumping you two!

Thanks to my ever vigilant Senior Actress-Sports Relationship Correspondent in Philly for this late breaking tip!

Scarlett Gives Old Geezer the Heave-Ho...

According to our reliable source actors Sean Penn, 50, and Scarlett Johansson, 26, have split!  We DID NOT see this coming, Madonna is rolling in her grave! I usually don't post until there's official quotes from reps, but me thinks this one is really a go-er.  We really thought these kids were gonna make it!

Thanks to my extremely hard working Senior Actor-Actor Correspondent in San Fran, who apparently doesn't sleep until she reports the news!

Thursday, June 2, 2011


Jennifer Aniston and Courtney Cox, Hollywood’s original BFF’s, are allowing tensions to rise because of Courtney's rumoured relationship with Cougar Town co-star Brian Van Holt. Jen is not happy and thinks that the fact that she won’t divorce David, she's doing to him, what Brad did to her! “Jen thinks Courteney is acting callous by running around with this guy but refusing to file divorce papers,” said a friend of Jens. “Like she’s playing mind games with David.” 

We really hope these kids make it, kiss and make up ladies, (I want Courtney and David to kiss and make up too, just putting that out there...)

Thanks for the tip from my Super Senior Best-Friend-Break-Up Correspondent in St Louis.

Wednesday, June 1, 2011

New Spidey Gets Untangled...

It must be that time again, break-up season! Andrew Garfield (The Social Network soon to be Spidey) has split after three years with Shannon Woodward (Raising Hope.) No other info to present, other than the fact that we really thought those kids were gonna make it!

Thanks to my Senior Actor-Actor Break-up Correspondent in San Francisco for this breaking news tip!