Tuesday, August 30, 2011

She Won't Be His Trouble & Strife...

Right out of a scene from Eastenders, actress, Jessie Wallace, dumped her 50-year-old catering boss fiance, Vince Morse, hours before their wedding!  He admitted to sending an explicit picture of her to his ex the night before. I hope the cancelled singing Elvis got a deposit.  I really thought those kids were gonna make it.

Friday, August 26, 2011

One, Two, Three Strikes You're Out...

Derek Jeter and Minka Kelly - U.S. Open-Day 6

Actress Minka Kelly (should I know her from something?) and baseball guy,* Derek Jeter, will not be heading to the World Series of Love, as after 3 years they've called it quits.  Here are all the other girls he didn't make it with in case you were curious: Mariah Carey, Miss Universe Lara Dutta, Scarlett Johansson, singer Joy Enriuez, Jessica Biel, Jessica Alba and Tyra Banks.  He sure likes him some pretty.  I thought those kids were gonna make it.

*Baseball guy is what I am down to as I've used every friggin' baseball pun/adjective in the book.

Thanks to my always on the ball Senior Actress-Yankee Correspondent in Northfield, NJ.

Wednesday, August 24, 2011

Happy Blogiversary to Us!!!

With the crazy news day yesterday, I totally missed our Blogiversary! So I just wanted to take the time to thank you all dear loyal readers from around the globe who make I Thought Those Kids Were Gonna Make It, the important and informative blog that it is.  From Beijing to Laguna Beach, from Philadelphia to North Carolina (formerly NJ), from St Louis to Dublin-- without my tireless correspondents, we are nothing.  Much love to you all and THANK YOU for reading! Now, how can I parlay this into a money-making endeavour?   

Tuesday, August 23, 2011

Two-fer Tuesday...Wake Him Up Before He Go-Go's

What a day, say it ain't so people! Will Smith and Jada Pinkett Smith have called it quits after 13 years AND George Michael and long-time partner Kenny Goss (who've been together since 1996!) have also split up. While Will and Jada chose In Touch Magazine to make their news public, George himself told the crowd from the stage of Prague State Opera. I really thought all those kids were gonna make it.

Thanks to my Senior Open-Marriage Scientologist Correspondent in Philadelphia for the early news tip!

UPDATE: I usually don't post updates when people get back together, we just wait to write their 2nd break-up post...however, TMZ (and my Senior Fresh Prince Reconciliation Correspondent in Las Vegas) has informed us all that the Pinkett-Smiths have responded to the rumours, and that they are just rumours and in fact still together. We're waiting kids, we're waiting.  

Monday, August 8, 2011

2 Will Not Become 1...

Spice Girl Geri Halliwell has split from her beau of over 2 years, English toff, Henry Beckwith.  He had a wandering eye, and she told him what she wanted, what she really, really wanted, and apparently he couldn't oblige.  We really thought, we really, really thought, those kids were gonna make it.

Sunday, August 7, 2011

Buried Under Beautiful Women....

Well it looks like after only 2 months actors Ryan Reynolds and Charlize Theron have broken up.  He sure gets the hotties, eh? Since I couldn't find any shots of them together, I'm posting a picture of delicious donuts, because I've been sugar and wheat free for 103 days now and I want to eat my own arm. I thought those kids were gonna make it.

Saturday, August 6, 2011

Gomez Takes Tylenol for her Bieber Fever...

17-year old boy wonder, Justin Bieber and Disney actress Selena Gomez have apparently split.  If someone were reporting my break-up with Tony at age 17 on their blog, I'd be all, " I'm Famous Bitch!" but I am sad the world has to endure their heartbreak collectively.  I really thought those actual kids were gonna make it.

Thursday, August 4, 2011

Pollyanna a NO Show...

Grant Show (you know, Jake from Melrose Place,) and his actress wife Pollyanna Mc Intosh (do you think she changed her name to that?) are splitting up after a 7-year marriage. She seems to be taking all the classic cars with her-- that's gotta hurt. I really thought those hot kids were gonna make it.

Thanks to my super Senior Old-Actor-Younger-Taller-Actress Correspondent in South Philly for this extremely important piece of news.

And forgive me for being so late on this one! Heiress Nicky Hilton and TV-dude-son-of-Movie dude-Jeffery Katzenberg, David Katzenberg, have called it quits after 4 years.  I really thought those rich kids were gonna make it.