Friday, November 4, 2011

Curbing Her Enthusiasm...


Well we're having a busy week here over at the ITTKWGMI offices. News just in that actress Vivica A Fox (47) and fiancĂ© Atlanta club promoter Omar "Slim" White (28) have broken off their impending nuptials.  Engaged since January and together a year before that, it's not yet confirmed who split from whom, what we can confirm is....we really thought those kids were gonna make it.



Thanks to my super vigilant Senior Giant Knockers-Club Promoter Relationship Correspondent in Philadelphia for this late breaking news tip.

Wednesday, November 2, 2011

Taking the Ride in the Relationship Death Cab...


Actress Zooey Deschanel and leader of Death Cab for Cutie, Ben Gibbard have broken up after 2 years of marriage.  Emo girls everywhere rejoice at the news. I thought those kids were gonna make it.

Thanks so much to my Senior Global Actress-Indie Rock Relationship correspondents for chiming in from Philadelphia and Black Rock.

Tuesday, November 1, 2011

Sour Grapes and Hard Cheese on the Menu at Le Bec-Fin...


Our Senior Regional Restaurant Relationship Correspondent in Bluebell, PA informed us of the break up of Le Bec-Fin chef Georges Perrier and his wife Andrea Rosenstiehl. Our correspondent felt the Eastern seaboard needed to be informed of this very important information and apologizes to the rest of our worldwide readership who could care less.  The only time I've ever seen the inside of Philadelphia's old school schmancyness is when I worked at the travel agency next door and got change from the bar downstairs, or to drop off an occasional piece of mail. Anyway, I really thought those kids were gonna make it.

Monday, October 31, 2011

Kimpossibly Short...


Really? 72 days, really? I mean, who really thought these kids weren't gonna make it (to another season?) I sure thought they were gonna!  Reality starlet Kim Kardashian and NBA player Kris Humphries are getting a divorce after making only 18-million dollars on their wedding extravaganza.  Let's hope the Kurse of reality TV doesn't affect her sisters!

A very special thanks to my tireless Senior Kardashian Correspondent in Philadelphia, it is a full-time job you know!

Sunday, October 30, 2011

Duffy Has No Mercy....


Singer Duffy has split from her rugby playing tall drink o' water Mike Philips, for the 2nd time, we actually missed it the first time around!  I really thought those kids were gonna make it.

Thursday, October 27, 2011

Balls, Cars and Guidos...




Matt Barnes and Gloria Govan, you may know them from NBA's LA Lakers and VH1's Basketball Wives, have split up.  There's some shite about their twitters that are not even worth cutting and pasting. They're pretty, they'll find new people to annoy, however, I really thought those kids were gonna make it.  There were so many shots to choose from of these two, but I think the matchy-matchy shot above is the classiest.



Ex-Pussycat Doll now X Factor America star Nicole Scherzinger has split from her long-time boyfriend, race car driver, Lewis Hamilton. Their work keeps them apart and they felt it was time to put this puppy to bed.  Apparently this 2nd break-up is for reals.  I really thought these handsome kids were gonna make it.

Ronnie and Sammi of "The Jersey Shore" were spotted out today after grabbing Gelato with the rest of the cast on Collins Ave in Miami where they are filming season 2 of the hit show. They seemed very much together again in front of the cameras as they smiled, laughed and playfully argued. At one point Sammi flipped Ronnie the bird as they walked down the street. The couple who are known for their rollercoaster romance in season one were reportedly split up but today seemed very much together. We look forward to seeing more of the pair together in the sunshine state.

Jersey Shore on again, off again, fighting favourites Sammi Giancola and Ronnie Magro have broken up.  AGAIN.  Enough already, if you say you're done Sammi, be done! See you two next season, cause I really think these kids are gonna make it.

shakira gerard pique parisian pair 02

And I'm seriously late on this one, but thought since we were here I'd be thorough, Shakira has dumped her footballer boyfriend, FC Barcelona star Gerard Pique, because in a shock development for rich, spolied football players, he apparently cheated on her with a younger woman. Even though they've only been together 6 months, I really thought those kids were gonna make it.

I would just like to say, it's been mental here at the ITTKWGMI offices, and I really hope my Senior Correspondents around the globe get crackin' as we were late on every damn one of these stories, you're not relying in ME to keep up with the gossip are you? 

Friday, October 21, 2011

Breakup Not So Superbad...


I missed one! Formerly chubsy ubsy actor, Jonah Hill, has split from his girlfriend Jordan Klein.  Together since 2008, they decided to call it a day.  You rock those horizontal stripes Jonah!  I really thought those kids were gonna make it.

Saturday, October 15, 2011

There's Gonna Be A Teenage Riot...


Following on with our rock and roll break-ups this week, Kim Gordon and Thurston Moore, of Sonic Youth, have split after 27 years! A moment of silence please, cause I thought those kids were definitely gonna make it!!!
Awww don't we look happy? This was at my old fantastic job at Indre Studios when Sonic Youth came for a broadcast recording. We could be related right? Photo by the talented Kathleen Hill

Thank you to my Senior Alt-Rock Relationship Correspondent in Vegas for this tip!


And because one wasn't enough today, Coronation Street actor Michael Le Vell has split with his wife of 25 years, Janette Beverley.  You may recognize him from the recent news as he'd just taken a break from acting to deal with the accusation of sexual assault from a teenage girl who claims it happened when she was 6. Ouch.  I thought those kids were gonna make it.

Wednesday, October 12, 2011

A Rolling Stone Gathers No Brazillian Models...


Tis an honour to have a Rolling Stone grace our blog not once, but twice. Ronnie Wood (64,) has split from his Brazillian model girlfriend, Ana Arujo (32.)  He is apparently taking a "sabbatical" from her as he has been frustrated by her desire to be in the public eye.  But this is my favourite quote, when asked where his girlfriend was at Macca's recent wedding (mazel tov Paul,)  Wood's reply was, "I don't know about that, it's not my bag." She's not his bag anymore!  I really thought those kids were gonna make it.

Tuesday, October 11, 2011

No Glee for Lea...


Glee's Lea Michelle has split from boyfriend, Broadway actor, Theo Stockman. They're gonna stay friends, isn't that swell? I really thought those kids were gonna make it.  Had I not gotten the awesome care package that included the most recent People Magazine, from the uber talented Colleen Mc Farland, I would've completely missed this one! Thanks for the newstip, and I hope you and your talented husband Peter Nova stay far away from this blog!

Friday, October 7, 2011

Sad TV...


Mad TV's Debra Wilson is splitting from her husband, cinematographer, Cliff Skelton, after a five year marriage citing irreconcilable differences, but I ain't one to gossip.  I really thought those kids were gonna make it.



Thanks to my Senior Gossip-Never-Sleeps Correspondent in NJ for the overnight news tip.

Tuesday, October 4, 2011

Who's Not Eating Gilbert's Grapes?


Blake Lively and Leo DiCaprio have split up, and thus, by announcing their break-up, they confirm they were actually a couple......And breath.  I really thought those rich and famous kids were gonna make it.

Sunday, October 2, 2011

Take A Walk...


Actress Stacey Dash (Clueless), is now officially divorced from (third) husband and actor-true-a-hole, Emmanuel Xuereb. Ain't nobody gonna hit her in the face and get away with it! Mmm Mmmmm!


Another a-hole to file for divorce this week is Boston Red Sox pitcher John Lackey, who is splitting with his wife Krista who is currently battling breast cancer and recovering from a recent double mastectomy. Apparently a gossip site texted his phone right before a game about these personal matters and he didn't pitch so well that day, guess he can't take the heat.

I really thought all these kids were gonna make it, but with a-holes like that, I think these girls are better off single!

And just to add to this post a little late, famous nobody Katie Price has split from her latest oily beau-hunk, Argentinian model, Leandro Penna after 7 months, and rumours they were about to get hitched.  They had to use the help of a translator to have the heartfelt breakup discussion. He has flown home. She will probably be dating someone new in 3 hours, however, I really thought those kids were gonna make it.  Man does he look like Ricky Martin or wha?

Sunday, September 25, 2011

Against All Odds...

Although actress I've never heard of, (and daughter of Phil Collins) Lily Collins and Twilight star, Taylor Lautner, have never actually admitted to being in a relationship with each other,  they have reportedly broken up just one week in advance of their film’s premier, Abduction.  Us Weekly reported that it was a “clean break that Taylor initiated.” Ouch, clean break. Here's hoping their promotional and party tour for the movie isn't too awkward.  Do you think she could feel the breakup "Coming in the Air Tonight?" Come on! That was too easy!  I thought those kids were gonna make it.

Thanks to my ridiculously vigilant Senior Actress - Wolf Boy Correspondent in NJ.

And on another note, a VERY HAPPY ANNIVERSARY to my best friend and amazing husband and Dad....we will not be appearing on this blog EVER I tells ya!

Tuesday, September 20, 2011

And Don't Call Me Shirley...


I have to admit, they're my favourite of the Teen Mom couples, Amber Portwood and poor ol' Gary Shirley, have really, truly split up for good like.  He took to Twitter to complain, here's a few:
  • I’m completely through w amber No more back n fourth sh*t. I got my precious baby u got your precious anderson men hope your sins r worth it  
  • Hard to turn u away today, heading u cry was hard but your actions were terrible and this time there was no reason for what u did. No love.
I really thought those actual kids were gonna make it, again.


Here She Isn't...


TV's Gary Collins, and his wife (former Miss America) Mary Ann Mobley, have filed for legal separation, all while she's going through chemo! For her to file amid this, he must be REALLY drunk! Gary's been stung for DUI (3 times!) and leaving a restaurant without paying this past year, so me thinks he's got some personal shit to work out. I really thought those kids were gonna make it.



Thanks to my supersonic Senior Actor-Pageant Winner Correspondent in NJ for the overnight news tip.

Sunday, September 18, 2011

She has the EX Factor...


Well, after reports that Simon Cowell's fiancee, Mezhgan Hussainy, had moved into one of his other LA properties (also known as the "Girlfriend's Graveyard,") it is official the pair have called it a day.  She apparently didn't get on with Simon's Mommy and she got to keep the ring and a lifetime supply of tight V-neck short sleeved shirts.  He's already dating a mystery British brunette.  I really thought those kids were gonna make it.

Thursday, September 15, 2011

Don't Stop Believin' Your Wife is Actually Missing...



Well, I don't report the "back togethers" but I'm here to tell you AGAIN that Cameron Diaz and Alex Rodriguez are back in splitsville. OK? I don't want to see them again on my blog dammit! But I did think those kids were gonna make it.



Also, here's a weird one. Remember that couple, Michaele and Tareq Salahi, that "snuck" into that White House state dinner and got a failed reality series (Real Housewives of DC?) Well he apparently reported her missing, when she had actually left her husband (willingly) and went on tour with Journey's Neil Schon. That's a reality show I'd actually watch!  Ouch!  I thought those kids were gonna make it.


I'd like to thank my Senior Reality TV Runaway Correspondent in Maryland for this late breaking news tip!

Friday, September 9, 2011

Splitsville for Darlene...

Sarah Gilbert And Allison Adler At The Mr. Bones Pumpkin Patch

Well, a few weeks ago Sara Gilbert, (you know, Darlene from the show, Roseanne) and TV producer/writer-partner-of-10 years, Allison Adler, have split amicably.  I have no idea how I missed this one! The only thing I can think of is, the tabs were flooded with updates on Little House on the Prairie's Melissa Gilbert and Bruce Boxleitner's divorce being filed the same day as this late breaking news. What the hell? I really thought those gals were gonna make it!

Tuesday, September 6, 2011

Love Machine No Mo'...



Girls Aloud "singer" Sarah Harding and DJ Tom Crane have split up. She spent the summer "working" in England while he was in Ibiza and apparently this put a strain on their 4 year relationship.  This is very important information that we should all memorize for tomorrow's exam. I really thought those kids were gonna make it.